Rescue Me!

I have this thing- I watch TV shows and fall into crush with certain male characters. When I started to think about it I realised the thing in common with all these crushes was I reckoned all the guys would be able to rescue me! Now those who know me in real life know I am mega strong and probably would not dream I want to be rescued by a man- well I guess deep down I do!

Maybe it’s a primeval urge- you man, me woman- come bash me over the head and drag me off to your cave! Who knows- maybe I need therapy hahahah! Anyway so it appears I do have a type and whether he’s a hero or an anti hero (as in Heathcliff from Wuthering Heights- see I remember my sixth form English Lit lessons) he’s one strong, intelligent dude that’s for sure!

My top 8 fictional character men I want to be rescued by... the only order is chronological- i.e. when I first realised I wanted them!

1. Mulder (David Duchovny, X Files)- possibly where all this started! He’s smoking hot looking, intelligent, strong yet fragile, tall, smoking hot... oh wait I said that already. And his lips- he has the most lovely looking soft lips! I spent my formative years yearning to be your Scully! How many years did I watch waiting for you to kiss her!! Shame that damn bee got in the way! I wanted to believe so badly- believe me!

2. Wolverine (Hugh Jackman, X Men)- this is an old crush of mine and the only time I fancy Hugh Jackman- he’s just too camp and pretty in real life!! So what is it about Wolverine that gets me every time- is it the grizzly facial hair? The finger knives?  The smouldering eyes? Whatever he’s in my top eight! Another “ pick me up and carry me off to your cave” favourite! Always good for a weekend hangover box set fest- all the Xmen films- always perk me up!

3. Jack Bauer (Kiefer Sutherland, 24)- Oh Jack- what can I say that hasn’t been said before? You are the man of men! Alpha male does not even begin to cover it! You had me from hour one and when you kissed Audrey’s knee I nearly fainted! I loved you from the tip of your toes to the strap of your man bag. You would be able to rescue me and I would promise not to keep dithering off like that dippy Kim! Once rescued I would stay rescued! Now upload the schematics to my PDA, dammit!

4. Sawyer (Josh Holloway, Lost)- Guess I like a bad boy- but was he bad boy really? I got so lost in Lost I can’t remember! This is one that does transfer to “real life”- fancied him in the Davidoff commercial too hahahah! Not usually into blondes but make an exception for him- plus I really want him to call me Freckles, pick me up and carry me off to his bivouac! I also want to play with his hair!

5. McSteamy/ Mark Sloane (Eric Dane, Greys Anatomy)- while most other girls were dreaming about McDreamy- I just couldn’t see it- I wanted the tall drink of water that was McSteamy! Why? He’s stronger a bit more mysterious, less wimpy- more of a real man in my eyes I guess!  His face is what gets me- it’s lush! I want Dr Mark to smile that hot smile at me! 

6. Captain Jack Harkness- NOT Sparrow! (John Barrowman, Torchwood)- I can’t believe this little sci-fi gem passed me by for so long- found and watched all last year and oh man did I crush Captain Jack. Sometimes living in Dubai we are out the loop TV wise and stumble across things not knowing what the background is- so basically I had a full on crush developed before I found out JB is gay in real life- so illusion shattered! Still think he’s hot though but I know we can never be together! Not cos he’s gay but because he is possibly the Face of Bo! (geek Dr Who reference- sorry!)

7. Eric Northman- (Alexander Skarsgård, True Blood)- yes I know he’s a vampire- I don’t care- I would, I would! This one is a cross over from crushing of the Eric character in the books to adoration of the screen character! I never liked Bill in the books either! He’s tall, brooding, so strong, hot bodied, funny- oh man getting all hot and bothered just thinking about it! Ok so him rescuing me might make me have to join the legions of the undead but who cares! 

8. Dr Cal Lightman/ Tim Roth- a new surprise entry! Have just watched all of Lie To Me- except the last episode of Season 3- I don’t want it to be over yet!  So I keep dreaming about him and he rescues me every time! Guess I want him to do the head tilt and funny hand thing at me- see to the centre of my soul, fall madly in love and let me cook him baked beans on toast for the rest of our happy lives! Yes, luv!

Oh god just realised maybe it’s a long coat thing??? 

Time to do a comparison to try and draw some conclusions?

The Man Chart- click on it for larger version!

So I guess in summary I am looking for a 42.5 year old, American, brown/ blondy haired, clean shaven, short haired, over 6 foot guy in some sort of long swishy coat, must look good in a white vest and with a degree and who knows how to handle a gun!

Now where in Dubai am I going to find him? 

Answers on a post card please- or in the comments section below at least!

(Am worried now- is it just me that has these mega, never gonna happen crushes on fictional characters??? I do hope not!)

Big Fat Gypsy Weddings

Yes that is the same carriage Jordan got married in!

Well I do love a good documentary and this latest Channel 4 offering seems to have it all- giant wedding dresses, monster trucks, stretch hummers for first communions and spray tans for 6 year olds! You can watch it on that level and laugh and be amazed- but beneath the 21 layers of petticoats and kids dancing like they really shouldn't be- there is much more substance to the programme which may be missed by many.

I think living in the Middle East for so long has made me way more tolerant and also fascinated by other cultures and religions- my last TV-documentary- spawned- interest was about The Amish through The World's Squarest Teenagers (awful title by the way- did not do the series justice but I bet it grabbed people's attention.) That show was so thought provoking about the modern way of life and religion- it made me cry many a time! Click here for info

Anyway back to the travellers/ gypsies. They are a community striving to keep hold of their ways and traditions in a world that seems hell bent on not letting them live their way of life. Maybe I am being really naive and need to do a lot more research- but if they are trying to live their lives, follow the rules of their society and keep themselves to themselves- why not just let them get on with it? This week watching the campsites getting bulldozed was really sad- their "natural habitat", so to speak, has been taken by giant Asda's and Tescos etc. so there is nowhere for them to go. There are so much more worse segments of society in the UK causing all sorts of trouble- focus on them!

Am off to do a lot more research on them now! Do watch the documentary if you get chance- it is a complete spectacle but with lessons to be learnt in there too!

Big Fat Gypsy Weddings

(P.S. Purely on a really plastic superficial level- man, I really want to get married in a dress with fairy lights and moving butterflies hahahahhahah! Maybe there really is a secret Barbie princess hiding inside every woman hahahha!)